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    Wednesday, August 24, 2005

    Heavy Metal Created By The Flying Spaghetti Monster

    Stardate 4448.7

    I was amazed to find out that the Flying Spaghetti Monster is actually a great fan of metal music. Indeed, his noodly appendage reached out and touched my guitar to bless my music...
    Somehow, I find it ironic that I was playing "Master of Puppets" by Metallica when he appeared before me.

    Now a task has been bequeathed upon me by his noodliness, so I must endeavour to write an epic 14 minute song based on the correct methodology of cooking pasta humanely and the proper etiquette to be used when eating noodly food using only a teaspoon. All of this to a driving power metal beat.

    He seems to have a thing for stringed instruments, perhaps stemming from the fact that he created electric guitar strings partly in his own image...

    We can see by comparing these two images, that of the pasta noodles here, and the two close-ups of various electric guitar strings, that The Flying Spaghetti Monster, in his noodly greatness, did in fact create electric guitar strings in his own image. This shows his greatness and admiration for not only electric guitar, but metal music in general.

    Notice how He subtly shapes the strings after each noodle with meticulous detail. This is the painstaking efforts He takes when creating anything. In fact, some metal bands have even written their own songs to noodlism.

    If you can, be sure to check out "Kraf Dinner" by Annihilator on their Never, Neverland album. It is an ode to the struggling musician and how they are sustained through the Will of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

    Cupboard's bare, I'm so hungry
    Life ain't fair, gimme some money
    Macaroni maniac, a cheddar cheese heart attack
    I love, I love, I love, I Love:KRAF DINNER
    Boiling water, I can't wait
    It's getting hotter, it feels so great
    Macaroni maniac, a cheddar cheese heart attack
    Repeat Chorus
    Well that was fun, but now that I'm all done
    Now sedate, I think I'll buy a crate
    Macaroni maniac, a cheddar cheese heart attack
    Repeat Chorus
    Kraf Dinner
    Kraf Dinner
    My Dinner
    I want it now

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